Looking for the Gift in Life’s Unexpected Events

I hope you are well beautiful soul and have been looking after yourself <3

I’m really not sure how it can be October already, but I feel a change of season is very welcome. Not that I don’t want the warmth of the sun or blue skies, but it is more a sense of moving forward through the year after feeling like groundhog day for months! 

That’s really what this email is about – looking for the gift in the learning or situation – even when it feels overwhelming or too negative.

Looking back on the Lockdown in March, I can now see the gifts present in that time. The fact that we had no time constraints on the day (no frantic school runs!), time with kids (beyond home learning!), had beautiful weather and were able to be outside, in paddling pools or trampoline).

It also showed the importance of family connection, seeing my parents and my kidlets spending quality time with their grandparents. Time that they will never get back or indeed experience again.

If you’ve seen any of my lives recently, I’ve mentioned that my Dad’s dementia deteriorated so much during lockdown that he is now in a nursing home. Those memories can never be experienced or made again, we have to change our view and re-focus those gifts. For me the gift is that I can actually see him once a week for 30ish minutes, something that many of my friends with parents in similar situation are unfortunately not able to do. 

So how can you reframe life at the moment – to see the gift that is there for you? I’d love you to share with me.

The rainbows are there to highlight the gift of sunshine, even when there is also rain.

I Won – Network Marketing Mum of the Year

Yes I know, it was last year, but do you know I didn’t shout about it! I didn’t create a blog – what was I thinking!!!

So I’m proud to share and shout from the roof tops (well WordPress!)  that I won the award of “Bizmum Network Marketing Mum of the Year” at the 2017 Bizmums Awards & Conference.

The judge shared her choice of winner, “Romella is dedicated to helping families and has built her network marketing business around that passion and dedication. Going above and beyond the norm, finding inspirational ways to blend her network marketing business into her life’s work.”

My business is Create Family Calm and I share & teach a variety of quick, simple daily tools to support frazzled mums and their children to bring balance, calm & happiness into their everyday lives. I’ve loved essential oils since I was in my teens and rediscovered them 18 months ago through dōTERRA. The essential oils blend easily into my support toolbox for Mums, empowering them to have access to life-changing essential oils and blends to calm, aid sleep and support their family’s wellness. Additionally Romella runs Shropshire Wellness Summits around the topic of essential oils and natural solutions to wellbeing, The Shropshire Wellness Summit was February 7th in Newport and was a mixture of presentations and interactive workshops around wellness solutions. From essential oils, meditation, reflexology, nutrition, anxiety, depression and more.

Bizmums, is a national social enterprise that provides child-friendly networking groups across the UK. Bizmums provides support, education and family friendly networking opportunities for Mums who are running their own businesses. There are day & evening groups running across Telford and Shrewsbury & the UK. Every year Bizmums holds a conference and awards ceremony to celebrate and acknowledge all the hard work and achievements of mums.

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Don’t Run to the Beat of Someone Else’s Drum

So 2018 is here. A new year, a new month, new possibilities. What changes are you going to make? What promises and vows are you going to make? When are you going to break them? What is social media saying you should be doing?  ENOUGH!

I’m fed up of social media telling me I should have new year resolutions, I should want to be slimmer, fitter, eat healthier, have a new vision board… Just because the calendar went from 2017 to 2018.

Now I always was a bit of a rule breaker (weird for someone who likes to control as well!!!). So no I will not be changing my life in 2018. the world didn’t end on 31st December at midnight and a new one start at 00:01am 1/1/18.

No, I won’t be committing myself to outcomes that I then beat myself up with or emotionally torture myself with if I fail.

 

I will make changes in my life as I feel it is the right time for me to do so.

When I am ready on an emotional, physical and mental level.

When I am balanced and emotionally committed.

When I feel I can commit to the actions and changes.

When I can work out what I truly need.

When I can work out a plan that is manageable and achievable for me.

When I can break the elements into small pieces, small enough for me to chew.

When I’ve allowed myself to cocoon and rejuvenate and re-energise myself.

When I’ve worked out what I really want and not what society thinks I want.

When I’m ready to progress with my life

When I’m ready for change

When I’m ready.

 

Push me and I’ll walk away or ignore you.

I dance and move to my own drum and no one else’s. Well maybe my children’s sometimes!

 

 

Focus Key Words for 2018 Rather Than Resolutions

It’s that time of the year. The fun and fizzle of the festive season has past. The excitement of the new year and new possibilities has burst into the mundane routine.

Feeling blagh! I don’t do resolutions, there’s always the need to lose a bit of weight and do more exercise whether January, May or October! I’ve tried in the past and then lost interest and ability to continue a few weeks in (OK may be 7 days in!). Then I’m left with the self-disappointment of failure and all those other negative emotions and self-talk start rolling in! Best not to do it  is my new philosophy – why put myself up for disappointment?!

Do I not set goals or aspirations? Yes I do, some are huge, just I don’t hang the success of the year or myself on them! So what do I do?

Firstly I sit quietly and meditate to clear the self-talk and mind-monkey that yaps on – a lot! Then whilst in that quiet space I sit and think and feel the three key adjectives that describe me and what I want to achieve this year. I need to feel them to see if they work for me (or resonate). Are they a good fit. I did this a couple of weeks ago and the words “calm – peace – opportunity”  came up.  Today I’ve done it again and have new words for myself in 2018:

For 2017 I had the key words of:

  • inner calm
  • flourish
  • connection
  • balance and calm

These words really mean something to me, I use them as a ruler when I want to create courses, make decisions  or with the family. I’m not sure I fulfilled the flourish but inner calm and connection were very much true for me!

 

For 2018 I have meditated and found these “feel” right for me:

  • inner calm
  • spiritual connection
  • pleasure & presence
  • in the flow and fluid
  • bloom

How do these work for ?

  • inner calm – emotional balance throughout the month (!), calm and positive around the family, space for me to find and attach my inner calm
  • Spiritual connection – to my higher & inner self, spiritual connection, connection to those I can empower
  • Pleasure & Presence – all I do needs to bring me pleasure or I won’t do it. Plus presence  in all do – mindful presence
  • in the flow and fluid – releasing blocks and issues and flowing downstream rather than fighting against the flow.  Fluid is being able to change direction or new paths
  • Bloom – for my business to flower and bloom and bring me and those it touches joy

So what would your words be? Please share them over on the facebook page!

And if a key word no longer fits or another comes along that’s better – that’s fine. I’ll adapt my key words so I’m in the flow – and not under pressure. So I don’t put pressure on myself for something I thought was right for me at the end of December or January 1st . The year flows from one day to the next and so does opportunity to be and connect to who you want to be

love and light

Romella

What’s in your name?

What do you call yourself?

What other names do you answer to?

How do you introduce yourself?

When are you “you” and not a role?

I’ve been thinking about this more and how I introduce myself. Most often I’m “Hello I’m Rom, Mum to x”, when I’m working “I’m Romella, I’m all about sharing quick simple tools to bring you into balance and calm”. It’s only occasionally that I’m “just” me. But there’s no just about it.

The person I am is part of all the roles I have in life; as mother, wife, daughter, teacher, friend, therapist, leader…  It’s my mindset, my actions, my beliefs, my objectives, my aims, my experiences which all become part of who I am – the real me.

How often are you your true self – not fulfilling the role of Mum, Daughter, Carer, cleaner, cook, laundry manager?

I’m finding I need to switch off from my roles and make sure I spend some time being me. This might mean that the ironing isn’t done very frequently, that I have my head in a book just for fun, that I need some lone time to meditate (maybe with a nap afterwards).

I really need time alone to “just be”, in order to be the best person I can to fulfill the roles I love to do. If I don’t get a good nights sleep, or the children fight bedtimes & I don’t get to switch off in the evening, or if I don’t meditate or miss my doTERRA supplements – then I won’t be the best person I can be. I get angry. upset, emotional.

I react differently to how my calm, normal self would have done in the same circumstances. I might blame them (the child, husband, other driver), but in reality it was me – my not prioritising myself, by not doing things that nurture and sort “me”, things that bring me into balance and calm. Often those around us share lessons with us that can go misunderstood or unrecognised.

Its important that we look after ourselves – as the slogan says – “You’re worth it”. If you aren’t looking after yourself, how can you look after others?

What do you do just for you?

If you can’t think of anything I can share some suggestions.

  1. Join me on a sunday evening at 8 pm for a free guided visualisation (or revisit past ones)
  2. Sign up for my free 7 day spiritual connection freebie (https://romella.simplero.com/page/74244)
  3. Want to meditate but can’t commit to a class – then why not try my monthly meditation group online (access weekly content, supported in a facebook group) – https://romella.simplero.com/page/71101-meditation-online-group
  4. Want to connect with your intuition, your feminine power, your spiritual connection? Then you could come to my monthly Women’s Circle (1st Weds of the month  £10) or join an online version (https://romella.simplero.com/page/72571-looking-for-a-better-connection
  5. Book yourself in to learn The Balance Procedure (a simple daily tool to get aligned to what you want to create in your life)
  6. Look at learning Reiki so you can give yourself some energy work at anytime day or night (and share with your family too)
  7. Use crystals (rose quartz for self love is perfect start). Search my blogs for getting started with crystals
  8. Look into essential oils ( I can do a one2one wellness consultation with you and give you free samples, or hold an introduction to essential oil classes at your home for you and your friends)
  9. Read a book – something uplifting
  10. Have a beautiful bath – candles, bubbles, wine, cup of tea whatever you enjoy!

Whatever you like to do, find time in your day and week to be the true you.

If you want to learn more about how you can connect to yourself – then please do contact me

yours positively & with love

Romella

x